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An Actual Working Spider-Man: Homecoming Mask You Can Buy, and More of the Best Toys of the Week An Actual Working Spider-Man: Homecoming Mask You Can Buy, and More of the Best Toys of the Week

Welcome back to Toy Aisle, io9's weekly roundup of the coolest toys and merchandise we’ve seen all week. This time we’ve got an insanely nerdy Star Wars SDCC exclusive, the most affordable way to replicate Spider-Man’s new eye-moving mask, and much, much more!

Hallmark Has Truly Outdone Itself With This New Star Trek Keepsake Ornament Hallmark Has Truly Outdone Itself With This New Star Trek Keepsake Ornament

It’s no secret that Hallmark has recognized the unique niche filled by its Keepsake Ornaments. The greeting-card behemoth releases new selections every year, and while some of them are of the traditional angel-and-snowflake variety, others are aimed squarely at geeky collectors.

Always Wanted to Be a Jedi? You Can Now Buy the Force in a Jar Always Wanted to Be a Jedi? You Can Now Buy the Force in a Jar

Well this is certainly convenient. If you’ve always wanted to be a Jedi (or a Sith) but weren’t born with an abundance of Midichlorians, someone has finally bottled the Force and will happily sell it to you for a mere $16.

The 12 Most Disturbing Hallmark Ornaments of All Time (Updated) The 12 Most Disturbing Hallmark Ornaments of All Time (Updated)

Back in 2013, I took on the unsavory, festive world of Hallmark ornaments. What I found, of course, rocked our nation to its core, but Hallmark’s onslaught of holiday WTF-ery did not end there. As such, I have updated our exposé of the company’s most unfortunate and upsetting ornaments.

Crayola Now Has Its Own Line of Coloring Books For Adults Crayola Now Has Its Own Line of Coloring Books For Adults

Crayola has always been the first name in coloring innovation, so it’s surprising it wasn’t the company behind the recent trend in adult coloring books. But now it’s showing everyone how it’s done with its own line of wonderfully-detailed coloring books targeted at those who are already masters of staying within the…

The True Meaning of Christmas Is Obviously Watching Spock Die of Radiation Poisoning The True Meaning of Christmas Is Obviously Watching Spock Die of Radiation Poisoning

Hallmark, you have outdone yourself. Although I feel like Kirk and Spock should be wearing little Santa hats, don’t you think?

The Only Darth-Vader-In-A-Holiday-Sweater Ornament You Will Ever Need The Only Darth-Vader-In-A-Holiday-Sweater Ornament You Will Ever Need

No matter what holiday (if any) you celebrate ‘round December, Hallmark’s “Holiday Darth Vader,” available in October, is something to behold. According to the description, “The Dark Lord ornament will sense your movement and deliver a Christmas message.” It’s one of several geeky releases for 2015.

Hallmark Made Star Wars Toys So Impossibly Cute Your Head Will Explode Hallmark Made Star Wars Toys So Impossibly Cute Your Head Will Explode

If you're easily nauseated by super-saturated displays of adorableness, you'll want to look away as soon as possible. Because Hallmark has created a series of plush Star Wars toys that push the limits of cute to the outer rim—and well beyond. Remember how intimidating Chewbacca was when you were a kid? Now he's cuter…

10 Ornaments That Make You Wonder What the Hell Hallmark Was Thinking 10 Ornaments That Make You Wonder What the Hell Hallmark Was Thinking

Every year Hallmark releases a treasure trove of Christmas ornaments, many of them nerdy as all get-out. This holiday season alone, there are ornaments from the Avengers movie, The Dark Knight Rises, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars and Star Trek, just to name a few! Of course, some of Hallmark's ornaments are simply…

These Wristbands Are Officially the Most Complicated Way To Text Someone These Wristbands Are Officially the Most Complicated Way To Text Someone

The kids are all about texting these days, right? So Hallmark—of all companies—has created these wristbands that allow young'uns to exchange simple ten character messages. But while they're cheaper than a cellphone, they're far less convenient to use.

All-In-One Card Stamp Wishes You Get Well Happy Christmas Thanks Easter All-In-One Card Stamp Wishes You Get Well Happy Christmas Thanks Easter

Fact: 99% of holidays were invented by Hallmark back in 1623, and since then, yearly life has been punctuated by needless festive ceremony. Well here's the stamp They Don't Want You To Know About.

Giant Snow Globes Recalled, Might Burn Down Your House Giant Snow Globes Recalled, Might Burn Down Your House

Your favorite pyromaniac might have to surrender his giant Hallmark snowman snow globe: The US Consumer Product Safety Commission just discovered that a bit of sunlight passes through them and it's "Goodbye drapes, hello firestorm!"

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